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The Sound of Music – XXX

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Saturday night I met Lambert at the 4th Avenue Cinema, a cute little theater that only plays old films.  As I walked toward it, freezing my ass off because he told me to wear a skirt, I see:  Now Showing – The Sound of Music.  Seriously?

As directed I purchased my ticket…I guess we’re going dutch…and entered the theater.  It was dark and Julie Andrews was already standing on a hill singing.  I heard  “pssssst”, turned and saw Lambert just where he said he’d be, seated in the back row.

I scooted through a row of empty seats, and noticed he had a full bucket of popcorn on his lap.  Oh my God.  He’s not gonna try the old hole in the bucket of popcorn trick, is he?  I plopped down next to him.

“You like The Sound of Music?”, he asked.  What? No, “Hi Nicole, you sure look nice in that skirt”? 

“I guess.  I haven’t seen it in forever though”.  I was too embarrassed to tell him I actually saw it a few years back with some girlfriends.  We went to a showing slash sing-a-long, and dressed in costume.  The menopausal von Trapp sisters.

“Want some popcorn”?  He asked.  My distrust was obviously transparent, because he lifted the bucket to show there would be nothing hiding at the bottom besides a few dead kernels.  I smiled and took a handful, looking at him as he watched the movie.

I sat there a while, periodically glancing at him, his eyes glued to the screen.  Finally I couldn’t take it anymore. “I’m just wondering, is this your favorite movie or something”?

His eyes never left the screen.  “Shhhhh.  You shouldn’t talk during a movie Nicole, it’s rude”.  He continued to shovel popcorn in his mouth.

What the hell?  There’s no one else in the theater.  Who the fuck is going to see the late night showing of The Sound of Music on a Saturday night anyway?   This is too weird, he’s too weird.  I grabbed my purse and stood up.  “I think I’m gonna go.  Thanks for the movie”.

As I turned to leave, he grabbed my wrist and squeezed, hard.  “Nicole”, he put down the popcorn then slid his hand slowly up my inner thigh.  Up it went until….bingo!  He ran his finger over my panties.  Oh shit.

“Sit down”, he said as he moved the popcorn.

I sat, then he leaned over and kissed me.  His hand slid back up my inner thigh and this time…he went in.

making out at movies

We basically did everything but have sex back there, while the von Trapp children serenaded us, Nazis invaded and then finally everyone ended up on the hill.

When the movie ended, we giggled, fixed our clothes and kissed a little more.  I can honestly say that was the most fun I’ve ever had at the movies in my life.

Then he walked me to my car and said, “I’ll call you some time this week”.  Wait…that’s it?  Really?

He pecked me on the cheek, got in his car and drove off.  Just then, the theater lights went out.  I stood there in the dark, confused and unsatisfied.

So, on the way home I stopped at Wendy’s and got a large chocolate Frosty.  I held it between my legs while I drove and that helped a little.  But nothing, no song, no  radio station, would get those fucking von Trapp kids out of my head!  It was like my Disney “It’s  a Small World” nightmare all over again.

So long, farewell
Auf Weidersehen, goodbye

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About Marnie

Writer, photographer, crafter & crappy chef

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